I cant, im done, I give up
The issue, for me, isn’t thin people who hate fat people. Just like I couldn’t care any less if a white person hates PoC. (Stay with me!)
What YOU think and feel actually isn’t any of my business. It isn’t my job as a human being to regulate your thoughts.
My problem is when you take your hatred and direct it at me (fat people generally speaking).
Now I know the militant fat haters who see this won’t read further than about here, but I’m going to finish this anyway.
See, when you say, “I’m not a bully,” or “I don’t hate fat people,” or “I just want you to be healthy and happy,” I have to call bullshit on you and here is why: what part of posting hateful messages and then tagging them with labels you know fat people search on tumblr is helpful?
How is you posting “fat people are fucking disgusting” and “I hate fat people” and “search that fatspo tag, its the best thinspo money can’t buy” /and tagging it ‘fatspo’, ‘fat acceptance’, etc…/ is helpful to fat people? What part of that is NOT bullying? What part of that is NOT hurtful and hateful?
So don’t preach about how you care. You don’t. You’re a bully, plain and simple. Hurting someone, actively hurting someone - especially strangers who’ve done NOTHING TO DRAW YOUR IRE EXCEPT EXIST - while telling them you care isn’t kind, it’s abuse. Bullies are people who abuse others.
You can hate fat people all you like, but do the right thing and leave that hate inside your own heart. There is absolutely no reason to make others suffer because you yourself are a victim of your own poison.
I need to know why when we talk about bullying in schools, no one points out that children of color are often bullied for their race. Especially if they are not the majority group in that school. A whole lot of fights I got into were after someone had some slick shit to say about my hair, my color, or my body. That’s one of the things that never seems to come up when people start going on & on about kids of color getting into fights at these schools. I mean if we can have 44754747 conversations about that one time the black girls were mean in 6th grade, where are the discussions about racial slurs that get tossed at kindergarteners? Or the conversations about racist teachers who encourage the bullying & the administrators who ignore what’s happening? When we’re talking about low test scores & drop out rates why don’t we talk about school environments & what kids have to face from their peers & the authority figures just to try to succeed? Oh right, those are hard conversations & they require listening skills & for people to believe children of color when they talk about their experiences and their feelings. They require a willingness to confront others (yes, even people you think are nice) when they do fucked up things to children of color under the guise of helping them. And no one really wants to do that work. My bad.
Almost all of the fights I had as a child, from kindergarten (yes, I started getting into trouble in kindergarten — it goes without saying that fights are always blamed on the child of color) through high school had to do with race. As a Chinese kid who was obsessed with sports, racism in the locker room was particularly violent. A Chinese boy playing hockey and basketball? Come on. That’s about as accepted as a Black girl doing gymnastics.
That’s probably partly why I’m tracking this “feud” between Gabrielle Douglas and Excalibur Gym. And what the story tells me, so far, is that despite lots of fluffy talk in recent years from “responsible adults” who claim to want to combat bullying, most people remain absolutely unserious about it. People responding to a child’s tales of pain by going on the attack, demanding names, dates, proof. How unserious can you get?
Excalibur Gym is actually considering filing a lawsuit against Gabby Douglas for slandering them with the accusation of racist bullying; which is simply more bullying behavior via legal avenues, meaning that what they’re actually teaching their students by example is racist bullying. That’s the lesson being taught by this “prestigious” gym in Virginia: bully the Black girl, go on the attack, keep escalating against her. Good thing they can’t snatch those two Olympic gold medals from her neck, because I’m sure they would if they could and I wouldn’t be surprised if they try.
that part of the interview angered me. and that’s certainly something white parents, in particular, aren’t going to teach their children NOT to do because they don’t want to talk about, acknowledge, let a alone confront racism. i think one of the videos on youtube where two prepubescent white chicks spewed a full video of racial slurs about their fellow classmates and one of the girl’s mothers made them apologize. apologize? that tells me enough about how white parents understand and deal with racism - it’s just like saying someone has “cooties” - not a systematic issue that should be taken seriously. apologizing doesn’t tackle the issue, but if anyone were to be apologizing, it should be the parents of these children. they are the ones that have failed (or more so, this society). additionally, i think PoC parents have to have these conversations with their children and equip them with the skills, or at least the possible expectation that these things can happen.
“There’s a grotesque irony in declaring that what is portrayed in Bully should be softened, or bleeped — should be hidden, really, because it’s too much for kids to see. Of course it’s too much for kids to see. It’s also too much for kids to live through, walk through, ride the bus with, and go to school with. That’s why they made the movie.”
Linda Holmes, writing about the R rating given to the documentary ‘Bully’.
There’s a second paragraph I wanted to quote as well, but I’m adding it down here as a separate thing due to the change in voice:
The entire point of this film is that kids do not live with the protection we often believe they do — many of them live in a terrifying, isolating war zone, and if you hide what it’s like, if you lie about what they’re experiencing, you destroy what is there to be learned.
Because while very pertinent, this chunk feels much more aimed at those who have the privilege of making that assumption - that kids are protected at all.
I acknowledge that you went through bad things. I really do. I am very sorry you went through that. You didn’t deserve it in any way.
But you DID NOT go through those bad things because you’re male/white/able-bodied/middle-class/cis/straight/etc.
But people have gone through horrible shit, and horrible shit was made worse because they were female/PoC/a person with disabilities/poor/trans*/same-sex loving/etc.
That’s all people are saying when they rant about oppression, privilege, and social justice issues. This, in no way, negates what you went through. If you think so, then your thinking is severely warped.
However, you ARE negating what marginalized people go through when you rant on and on about all the terrible shit you went through and talk down to marginalized people for focusing on their problems or for needing to have trigger warnings on certain things. And it’s a pretty emotionally manipulative move, to be blunt.
Not to say you can never talk about what happened to you (actually, you should, and you have spaces to do so), but if you use it to shut marginalized people down, then there is something seriously wrong with YOU, and YOU need to “go to therapy if you can afford it.” Because all you’re doing is being a straight-up bully. Not to mention oppressive.
Whenever there’s trouble around the Chinatown and Gallery Place Metro stations in the District, the finger of blame often points to a most unusual group of suspects: a black gay gang called Check It.
Depending on whom you talk to, they’re just a bunch of mischievous gender benders and drama queens, vulnerable gay youths seeking safety in numbers. Or, they’re one of the largest, more aggressive gangs in the city.
To hear the leader of Check It tell it, there may be some truth to both.
“I just got tired of people beating on me and calling me faggie,” Tayron Bennett, 21, told me recently. He’d helped to organize Check It while a student at Hine Junior High School. Other gay youths from his Trinidad neighborhood in Northeast soon joined, followed by gay youths from throughout the city.
D.C. police estimate that Check It has a core membership of about 20 and counts between 50 and 100 others as “associates.”
“At first, I tried fighting bullies one-on-one, but they don’t fight fair; they fight two and three on one,” Bennett said. So the youths got together and “started carrying mace, knives, brass knuckles and stun guns, and if somebody messed with one of us then all of us would gang up on them.”Check It.
Gay teen’s parents: Bullying continued after his suicide
The parents of Jamey Rodemeyer, who committed suicide at 14 after being bullied, alleged Tuesday that even his death hasn’t ended the harassment: At a school dance after his wake, they said, bullies chanted that the gay teen was “better off dead.”
Parents. Administrators. Teachers. Media. We need to better.
This is where I live. It would break my heart even if it wasn’t, but that makes it hit so much closer to home.
A judge declared a mistrial Thursday in the case of an Oxnard teenager accused of killing a gay classmate.
The vote was 7 to 5 in favor of finding Brandon McInerney guilty of voluntary manslaughter.
Jurors in the case, in which McInerney fatally shot 15-year-old Larry King in a junior high school computer lab, were ordered earlier Thursday to continue deliberating despite failed vote.
I just can’t right now.