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Esoterica

gradientlair

7 Things To STOP Saying To Black Women About Beauty

gradientlair:

1) Stop calling our natural hair ugly.

2) Stop approaching our natural hair with a hierarchy than reinforces colourism.

3) Stop using placement in the natural hair community to bully Black women who may still have relaxed hair or weaves.

4) Stop saying “she’s pretty…for a dark-skinned woman.”

5) Stop saying “she’s pretty…for a big/fat woman.”

6) Stop implying that any biracial women who identify as Black or any light skinned Black women are the only ones that are attractive, and stop acting like any Black woman who deviates from this appearance should be “lucky” to have a man, regardless of how utterly lousy that man might be. Love is not something to be rationed out like a commodity only for those who are closest to appearing White.

7) Stop saying “you’re too pretty to be single.” Attraction to someone has NOTHING to do with THEIR choice to pursue a relationship or not. This is inherently patriarchal and in fact not even a logical thing to say.

Who should stop this? ANYONE who does it (that’s you White and people of colour), INCLUDING other Black men and Black women. Reject White supremacist, Eurocentric and patriarchal thoughts about beauty.

(via witchsistah)

twerks4loanpayments

Soooooooo, just a quick question

aunaturale4life:

If Kanye and Kim don’t get married BEFORE Kim has this child will y’all jump down her throat, condemn her, and say that she’s a bad woman because she “didn’t do it right”?

Cuz a lot of people jumped down all of the throats of black women who had children out of wedlock when Beyonce announced her pregnancy.

But, then again, I don’t think people will since Kim’s not a black woman and apparently only black women need to be chastised for having children out of wedlock *sarcasm*

Just wondering

Why ask questions we already know the answer to though? I mean, no one is chin checking rappers (including Kanye), for having kids without the benefit of clergy. People don’t give a tiny tin fuck about policing the sex lives of anyone but black women.

anedumacationisnomore

Why aren’t little brown girls praised as much as little white girls?

thegoddamazon:

karnythia:

anedumacationisnomore:

So I just watched that documentary on shadeism that I reblogged from espirit-follet, and my head hurts and my heart aches.

Watching that little girl look at her own beautiful skin and hearing her talk about how ugly it was… pointing at the white models and not the black ones, talking about her aunt’s lighter skin and how different it is to her own…

You know, I never once thought of myself as a pretty child. Pretty was my white friends, my black friends and me, we were just there. Not very feminine, not like the white girls. Not desirable, not particularly popular with the boys the way the white girls were. I remember the time my friend Julia told me that she thought I was the prettiest girl she knew, and it floored me. First time anyone had ever told me I was pretty. I was eleven.

image

I look back on pictures, and I think to myself, why? I was a gorgeous kid. I had these big lovely brown eyes, black hair, golden skin, I was smart as a button, and very, very funny. And I look at the pictures of my white friends, and I don’t see much of a difference, other than our races. So why did they receive praise, and why didn’t I? I vivdly remember one incident at a slumber party: my best friend, a blonde white girl, told me that she was naturally beautiful, that she knew this, and that some people weren’t as lucky as her. And I remember thinking, how does she know that? Where does someone obtain that kind of knowledge? How is she so confident and secure in that knowledge? Someone must have told her. And she believed it? Because by the time I was eleven, I was so used to thinking of myself as the dirty, runty little brown kid, I refused to believe someone when they did praise me. 

The other black and brown girls I knew as a child — many of them learned to think of themselves as beautiful later on in life. And yes, I know that this is a universal experience, every girl goes through some kind of ugly duckling stage or another, hopefully emerging in late adolescence with a sudden reserve self-confidence — but no white girl goes through that journey the way we went through it. Because we have to come to terms with our race, not just our awkward bodies. We have to combat what other people can and will say about what certain features of our bodies. Our hair texture, the shape of our eyes, our dark or light skin, the multitude of shades that are painted on our bodies, our hairiness or lack of hair, our size, our breasts, our hips, our lips, our butts. 

Its a battle white girls don’t have to go through. There are all sorts of pressures on every woman in our society, but we have many, many more. Childhood and adolescence and womanhood are battlefields for us, and it can be a struggle to continue to think of ourselves as desirable, as female, as pretty

No wonder so many of us don’t make it. 

I wrote a post a while about becoming pretty (and man some of the comments it got were real damned doozies) & I find myself wondering now how much of that backlash was about me as a WOC describing myself as attractive & not being apologetic about it. I still get all weird when other people compliment me (I’m working on being able to respond without getting all twitchy), but I refuse to let people tell me that my skin or hair = ugly because it’s not part of a white beauty aesthetic. I also keep thinking about how often our mental health isn’t considered in these discussions because really how many young girls of color are growing up with body dysmorphia disorders that are race specific & yet never discussed or treated?

I’ve written several posts on this regarding a journey of dark skin being considered beautiful.

I didn’t get any backlash, but then again…

Well I also talked about street harassment & that always sets people into some kind of tizzy since women saying they have a right to bodily autonomy is like a Bat Signal for fuckery.

(via the-goddamazon)

anedumacationisnomore

Why aren’t little brown girls praised as much as little white girls?

anedumacationisnomore:

So I just watched that documentary on shadeism that I reblogged from espirit-follet, and my head hurts and my heart aches.

Watching that little girl look at her own beautiful skin and hearing her talk about how ugly it was… pointing at the white models and not the black ones, talking about her aunt’s lighter skin and how different it is to her own…

You know, I never once thought of myself as a pretty child. Pretty was my white friends, my black friends and me, we were just there. Not very feminine, not like the white girls. Not desirable, not particularly popular with the boys the way the white girls were. I remember the time my friend Julia told me that she thought I was the prettiest girl she knew, and it floored me. First time anyone had ever told me I was pretty. I was eleven.

image

I look back on pictures, and I think to myself, why? I was a gorgeous kid. I had these big lovely brown eyes, black hair, golden skin, I was smart as a button, and very, very funny. And I look at the pictures of my white friends, and I don’t see much of a difference, other than our races. So why did they receive praise, and why didn’t I? I vivdly remember one incident at a slumber party: my best friend, a blonde white girl, told me that she was naturally beautiful, that she knew this, and that some people weren’t as lucky as her. And I remember thinking, how does she know that? Where does someone obtain that kind of knowledge? How is she so confident and secure in that knowledge? Someone must have told her. And she believed it? Because by the time I was eleven, I was so used to thinking of myself as the dirty, runty little brown kid, I refused to believe someone when they did praise me. 

The other black and brown girls I knew as a child — many of them learned to think of themselves as beautiful later on in life. And yes, I know that this is a universal experience, every girl goes through some kind of ugly duckling stage or another, hopefully emerging in late adolescence with a sudden reserve self-confidence — but no white girl goes through that journey the way we went through it. Because we have to come to terms with our race, not just our awkward bodies. We have to combat what other people can and will say about what certain features of our bodies. Our hair texture, the shape of our eyes, our dark or light skin, the multitude of shades that are painted on our bodies, our hairiness or lack of hair, our size, our breasts, our hips, our lips, our butts. 

Its a battle white girls don’t have to go through. There are all sorts of pressures on every woman in our society, but we have many, many more. Childhood and adolescence and womanhood are battlefields for us, and it can be a struggle to continue to think of ourselves as desirable, as female, as pretty

No wonder so many of us don’t make it. 

I wrote a post a while about becoming pretty (and man some of the comments it got were real damned doozies) & I find myself wondering now how much of that backlash was about me as a WOC describing myself as attractive & not being apologetic about it. I still get all weird when other people compliment me (I’m working on being able to respond without getting all twitchy), but I refuse to let people tell me that my skin or hair = ugly because it’s not part of a white beauty aesthetic. I also keep thinking about how often our mental health isn’t considered in these discussions because really how many young girls of color are growing up with body dysmorphia disorders that are race specific & yet never discussed or treated?

witchsistah:

beautifulhikari:

I’m sorry I was born light skinned.
.
.
.
.
.
No, I’m not sorry I was born lighter than most. I will not apologize for something I had no control over. Im just so sick and tired of darker skinned PoC trying to make me feel bad for something I HAD NO CONTROL OVER. I didn’t ask to be born light skinned.

I’m also tired of darker skinned PoC trying to make ALL lighter skinned PoC the bad guys. I’m fucking tired of people assuming I think I’m better than you because my skin is lighter. I don’t think I’m better than anyone. Hell, I wish we could all be treated equally.

I’ll admit, lighter skinned PoC do have it way easier than most darker skinned PoC. I say most because not all dark skinned PoC have lived a hard life.

I don’t wish to be brown skinned or dark skinned because I love my skin color. However, I fucking love brown skin & dark skin. There’s just something sooooooo sexy about darker skin. Lol, I still have love for the light bright boys tho.

Another thing before I end this little rant… Can we please learn the difference between brown skin and dark skin -_- most of the who claim they’re dark are actually brown.

My black is beautiful and so is yours and his and hers :-* black is ALWAYS beautiful no matter the shade.

Chile, this sounds like it came from the Derailing for Dummies playbook.  If White folks said this shit to PoC to get us to quit complaining about racism, we’d be so far up their asses they may actually get rhythm and learn how to twerk!

Light-skin folk won’t hesitate to use the same tools against dark folk that they complain that Whites use against them.

elfyourmother

undeadbishoujo:

wait hold up

on top of the atrocious and offensive casting of Zoe Saldana (offensive b/c it is 100% based in colorism and good ol Hollywood “only one black It Girl is allowed at a time” bullshit)

they also have the nerve to fabricate a relationship Nina Simone never had

with a man who is GAY irl?

so they are turning a real gay person straight for the movie?

as if this movie couldn’t get any more offensive

(via alltruthwaitsinallthings-deacti)

africanaquarian

But Hollywood has no trouble hiring darker complexioned actors when they need villains tho…

jhenne-o-lantern:

misscontraption:

oop

(via hamburgerjack-deactivated201404)

alostbird

Whitewashing

casual-isms:

alostbird:

Since apparently it was so hard the first time around for people to get and apparently people just can’t search through the ‘whitewashing’ tag for more information or go to any of these blogs (Racebending, Stop Whitewashing, DamnLayoffthebleach, Korraisnottan, Finite-whitewashing, Race in my fandom, etc) or simply use Google. I’m now going to explain it again, nicely for the last time. 

What is racism?

I’d like to point you to the real definition (12). The dictionary definition is not accurate since it wasn’t written by people who actually face racism. Those people would be People of Color (everyone that’s non-white). In a short sentence, white people do not face racism, PoC do. Also here is a fine explanation of whiteness.  More on understanding racism: The Angry Eye (Part 1, Part 2). White privilege. Colorblind racism [1, 2] Also Colorism [1,2, 3, 4, 5]

Now before we can continue read that again. White people do not face racism, PoC (everyone that’s non-white) do. Okay? Okay. Moving on. 

All whitewashing is racist and it’s extremely harmful. Let’s repeat it again. All whitewashing is racist and it’s extremely harmful. Got that? Good. Also there’s no such thing as Blackwashing. 

Now what is whitewashing? 

Read More

This post is crucial.
—nappyedges 

(via nethilia)

black-ink-on-pink

Why Skin Color of Fictional Characters are Important

black-ink-on-pink:

Okay. I’m going on another rant here and forgive me, but I saw something that just irks me so, and I’m feeling the need to grab people and shake them and beg them to just understand please

So I’m reading various things on tumblr, related to Legend of Korra, the portrayal and representation of dark-skinned characters in fiction, and the question that comes around is: Why is this even important? 

Let me answer that for you.

—-

Okay, so I have a boyfriend. He’s black, and like me, he’s into cartoons, anime, tv shows, etc.   On his facebook, he keeps an gallery of images of dark-skinned characters. Doesn’t matter if they’re Egyptian, South American, Indian, etc. Just dark-skinned characters in general. A friend once asked him why this gallery exists in the first place, and bf answered how they were all positive portrayals of black/dark characters in anime/video games/cartoons. 

That someone, who was Caucasian, was like, oh, and simply though it was a small quirk, little hobby, something my bf does when he’s bored. 

For bf and me, who are both persons of color, that gallery means much more than a quirky hobby. I can’t explain it well, but basically, it’s a huge deal for us, particularly him. It’s a collection of the few black/dark characters in fiction, it’s representation, it’s him seeing people who look like him be scientists and geniuses, do martial arts, kick ass, look beautiful, be human; it’s people who are dark-skinned be valued and be deep, developed characters and have their own stories and desires and goals; and it’s so damn rare in fiction that he has a gallery of about only 50 characters and that’s it. Compared to, say, the hundreds of thousands of light-skinned characters. 

My bf, he’s a writer. He wants to one day make books and tv shows and movies where the main character will be anything other than a straight white male character. He’s making his life goal to do so. 

Because growing up and even now, still, he was loved seeing characters that are black like him. Loved characters that looked like him getting to be heroes, go on adventures, save the day, be cheered on and loved - showing him that little kids like him, black kids, kids of color, can do anything they want and they are just as good as the white kids who are already heroes and adventures and princes and princesses and whatever the hell there is to be. In a society where he eventually grows up to tell me, one day, when we were out for a drive, how to respond if I ever get pulled over by a cop, to be respectful and calm and make no sudden movements - he doesn’t know if it’s different for Asians but still, be safe - and he has to do all this, be extremely careful simply because he’s black…well, it’s something when black/dark characters are portrayed as anything other than dangerous or expandable or a bunch of horrid shit. 

And then there’s me, who’s Chinese and tans easily and, along with my dad, is the darkest in the family. And let me tell you how screw-up colorism, light-skin-is-better-than-dark-skin mentality is, because there’s my mom (pale) who looks down on my dad for having olive skin and would hush hush tell me when I was younger how ‘dark’ my dad was and how ‘dark’ his family was, it was such an unfortunate thing, let’s hope that I don’t turn out like them, and made it as if their being ‘dark’ (at most an olive skin tone, geez) had something to do with all their flaws and whatnot. And then she goes through the trouble of wearing gloves when driving just so her arms wouldn’t get tanned and take out an umbrella when going outside on a sunny day. And I grow up in this setting, being told how pretty I would be if only I was pale like her.

I hate it. I hate all that and love it whenever I see somehow who is olived-skinned or dark-skinned and they were beautiful - considered beautiful, are beautiful-, and I would know that I am pretty too. And I hope no kid would ever grow up in a screwed-up environment like that and they can look everywhere and see that their dark skin is beautiful, desirable as well. 

So, Korra. Dark-skinned Korra, gorgeous and headstrong and desirable and powerful and Avatar, protector of the whole world - it’s one of the first time a dark-skinned character has been portrayed as so, main character of such a beloved mainstream TV-series. (My bf loves Legend of Korra and its predecessor series before it. I do too.) And if she is in fact getting lighter, even unintentionally. Well. That would be a devastating blow. 

And that’s why skin color in fiction is important. Because of formative influences, of subtle stuff in psychology that worms its way into the mind of little kids, telling them this is how the world worked, this is how your life will eventually be, this is the way you should think. Of the simple fact of having positive role models for all types of children. 

Please try to understand. And at the very least, please don’t just brush off and scoff these concerns. 

Flickr / swag_100_hundred
sideofdork:

coldeyesthatburn:

diasound:


Colorism

“This is a graphic that depicts the issue of colorism. Black people try to divide themselves among who is lighter than the other or darker than the other. However, we are all black people. Are roots all travel back to Africa: Black is Black is Black.”


in a real way.

but can we no pretend that light skin privilege doesnt exist? this is the equivalent of ” we all bleed red!!!” in my opinion. and erases the experiences of  Darker skinned black people. saying ” we are all black” isnt going to stop the little black girl from feeling she would be prettier if she was lighter.


Colorism is real outcheer. we might all be Black, but some of us get treated way fucking worse.

sideofdork:

coldeyesthatburn:

diasound:

Colorism

“This is a graphic that depicts the issue of colorism. Black people try to divide themselves among who is lighter than the other or darker than the other. However, we are all black people. Are roots all travel back to Africa: Black is Black is Black.”

in a real way.

but can we no pretend that light skin privilege doesnt exist? this is the equivalent of ” we all bleed red!!!” in my opinion. and erases the experiences of  Darker skinned black people. saying ” we are all black” isnt going to stop the little black girl from feeling she would be prettier if she was lighter.

Colorism is real outcheer. we might all be Black, but some of us get treated way fucking worse.

(via deliciouskaek)